lexi wrote:This guy buys a new motorcycle. The salesperson tells him that when it rains to go outside and rub Vaseline on it because it makes it look nice and shiny.
Later that night, he goes to eat at his girlfriend's house, and the rule at their house is if you talk during supper you have to do the dishes.
So they are eating and he looks at his girlfriend and kisses her. Nobody says anything. So he has sex with her right at the table and nobody says anything.
So he looks over at her mom and kisses her too. Nobody says anything. So he does her too. Next thing he knows he looks outside and it is starts to rain outside, so he grabs the Vaseline out of his pocket.
At that his girlfriend's dad stands up and says, ''Okay. I will do the damn dishes.''
haha
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Re: haha
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Re: haha
don't encourage her please....LordLuken wrote:lexi wrote:This guy buys a new motorcycle. The salesperson tells him that when it rains to go outside and rub Vaseline on it because it makes it look nice and shiny.
Later that night, he goes to eat at his girlfriend's house, and the rule at their house is if you talk during supper you have to do the dishes.
So they are eating and he looks at his girlfriend and kisses her. Nobody says anything. So he has sex with her right at the table and nobody says anything.
So he looks over at her mom and kisses her too. Nobody says anything. So he does her too. Next thing he knows he looks outside and it is starts to rain outside, so he grabs the Vaseline out of his pocket.
At that his girlfriend's dad stands up and says, ''Okay. I will do the damn dishes.''
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better then ur jokesscotty wrote:don't encourage her please....LordLuken wrote:lexi wrote:This guy buys a new motorcycle. The salesperson tells him that when it rains to go outside and rub Vaseline on it because it makes it look nice and shiny.
Later that night, he goes to eat at his girlfriend's house, and the rule at their house is if you talk during supper you have to do the dishes.
So they are eating and he looks at his girlfriend and kisses her. Nobody says anything. So he has sex with her right at the table and nobody says anything.
So he looks over at her mom and kisses her too. Nobody says anything. So he does her too. Next thing he knows he looks outside and it is starts to rain outside, so he grabs the Vaseline out of his pocket.
At that his girlfriend's dad stands up and says, ''Okay. I will do the damn dishes.''
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Re: haha
Ignore him Lex, I thought it was a good one!lexi wrote:better then ur jokesscotty wrote:don't encourage her please....LordLuken wrote:lexi wrote:This guy buys a new motorcycle. The salesperson tells him that when it rains to go outside and rub Vaseline on it because it makes it look nice and shiny.
Later that night, he goes to eat at his girlfriend's house, and the rule at their house is if you talk during supper you have to do the dishes.
So they are eating and he looks at his girlfriend and kisses her. Nobody says anything. So he has sex with her right at the table and nobody says anything.
So he looks over at her mom and kisses her too. Nobody says anything. So he does her too. Next thing he knows he looks outside and it is starts to rain outside, so he grabs the Vaseline out of his pocket.
At that his girlfriend's dad stands up and says, ''Okay. I will do the damn dishes.''
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Can you belive just got the sack at the local Pepsi store...Tests just come back from the lab,and I tested positive for Coke...
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You got you joke book back then?scotty wrote:Can you belive just got the sack at the local Pepsi store...Tests just come back from the lab,and I tested positive for Coke...
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Walked into the butchers today, and bet him £50 he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf...
Too right he said...the stakes are too high!..
Too right he said...the stakes are too high!..
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He who puts face in bowl of fruit drink..
Gets punch in face...
Gets punch in face...
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Re: haha
What has a tractor and a giraffe got in common ?
Ones got Hydraulics and the other has High bollocks....
Ones got Hydraulics and the other has High bollocks....
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Nah, just press the quote button as though you are replying to champ and it makes it readable!sienna wrote:hahaha,,jesus u need bloody a magnifying glass to read that lol
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u been looking in the showers again..room1day wrote:He's a fecking big bloke...Chris085 wrote:Need one to see Champ alsosienna wrote:hahaha,,jesus u need bloody a magnifying glass to read that lol
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Re: haha
For the short sighted
[quote="champ"]What has a tractor and a giraffe got in common ?
Ones got Hydraulics and the other has High bollocks
[quote="champ"]What has a tractor and a giraffe got in common ?
Ones got Hydraulics and the other has High bollocks
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Re: haha
A husband and wife noticed that their little boy's penis was a little too small so they took him to the doctor. They expressed their concerns to the doctor. The doctor said to feed the little boy lots of toast.
The next morning, the wife gets up really early and makes a huge stack of toast. When the little boy comes down to breakfast, the mother says,' Take the top two slices. The rest are for your father.'
The next morning, the wife gets up really early and makes a huge stack of toast. When the little boy comes down to breakfast, the mother says,' Take the top two slices. The rest are for your father.'
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Re: haha
Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his willy today in the playground!"
Before her mother could raise a concern, Sally said, "It reminded me of a peanut."
Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked, "Really small, was it?"
Sally replied, "No... Salty."
Mum fainted
Before her mother could raise a concern, Sally said, "It reminded me of a peanut."
Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked, "Really small, was it?"
Sally replied, "No... Salty."
Mum fainted
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twill wrote:Little Sally came home from school with a smile on her face and told her mother, "Frankie Brown showed me his willy today in the playground!"
Before her mother could raise a concern, Sally said, "It reminded me of a peanut."
Relaxing with a hidden smile, Sally's Mum asked, "Really small, was it?"
Sally replied, "No... Salty."
Mum fainted
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Re: haha
brunette walks into sex shop and says to assistant . i want to buy that tartan vibrator . assistant says your really blonde are'nt you ? , yes how did you know says blonde . because that tartan vibrator is my thermos flask ..
....................
Two Lesbians out walking in the countryside on a first date.It's a bit awkward getting around to sex,but after a mile or two,one of them says to the other,I need the loo....I'll just nipover this hedge.
The other one stands there thinking,and decides to nip over herself and surprise the other one.
She creeps up behind the squatting girl and starts to feel underneath her.
" My God" she shrieks," You've changed sex!"
" No" said the first one "I changed my mind,I'm having a shit."
..............
I met a transvestite from Bolton. She had a Wigan address.
....................
Two Lesbians out walking in the countryside on a first date.It's a bit awkward getting around to sex,but after a mile or two,one of them says to the other,I need the loo....I'll just nipover this hedge.
The other one stands there thinking,and decides to nip over herself and surprise the other one.
She creeps up behind the squatting girl and starts to feel underneath her.
" My God" she shrieks," You've changed sex!"
" No" said the first one "I changed my mind,I'm having a shit."
..............
I met a transvestite from Bolton. She had a Wigan address.
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Re: haha
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